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Sometimes You Just Have To Let Them Go!

Sometimes someone may come into your life, who is far from perfect, but you see the hidden gems in them. You see the best in them, their warm heart, their beautiful face, their young words of wisdom encased in an old soul. You think this is it! This is the awesome person that I may have been waiting for all my life, maybe as a friend or maybe more. 

But as months go by and your bond grows, your insticts are not 100% agreeing with your vision and very soon, the real person emerges, but this time these imperfections are more that that, they are an innocent and naive weapon, in the fight to control the situation and you. They are an intentional stab in the back, because you did not do what they wanted you to do. Because you weren’t there, they quickly replaced you with someone else. While you were expected to wait for them when they demanded it and ‘told’ you. And worse of all, they turned to one of your own friends, whom you know is a good person and known for years. And you are left with a feeling of betrayal, hurt and pain, all the whilst knowing that your friend although not interested in the same way, is also being used and they do not reply to you.

You toughen up and come to your senses, you feel pity for their insecurities, hurt by the redicule of your own hurt – as if it is some sort of joke, that lies seemed to have come flooding out like a volcano with multiple colours of lava flowing into the other. And you take back your own power, control and sense of calm in your life, by blocking them out from yours, as much as possible.

You feel a sense of peace, because for once in your life, you love yourself enough, to set yourself free. Free from the pain, the anguish and hurt, and not waste your life giving this person chances, but know that you can find someone else who will care about you and respect you no end. Even if they have not entered your life yet, you are confident and self-assured that they will do!

Some friends come and go – so do some loves. But the one thing I want you to remember, is to never leave your own soul. Never leave the true you. Never let yourself cry or be in pain longer than you need to be, to rid yourself from it naturally. Be there for yourself no matter what. To take the role of the father, the mother, and the child within you, when each situation calls for it. But most of all, to be the bestest ever friend to yourself, to love yourself implicitly, and to not settle for anything less than than what is good and right for you. Remember these 3 simple words to say to yourself – I LOVE YOU!

Always stay positive and be you.

Love Sandra xx

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Beauty Be You, Beauty Be Me! Inspirational poem by Sandra Bellamy! 

Beauty be You!
Beauty be Me!
Beauty is all around Us!
For the World to See!

But do you see IT?
In the Small things?
In the Big things?
In ALL things?

Do you recognise the beauty of Friendship?
Of Love?
Of Life?
Of Harmony or Strife?
Of Darkness or Light?

Do you see the beauty in Yourself?
In Sickness and in Health?
In Poorness and in Wealth?

Do you see the beauty in the Ordinary?
And the Extraordinary?

Beauty is You!
And beauty is Me!
That much beauty, is what I see.
From your nose, to your toes,
From your Mind, to your Spirit,
I love every Minute,
Of being with YOU xx

It’s Those Little Moments That Make All The Difference!

Chestnut With Angel

Chestnut And Angel Waiting To Be Cleaned Out 

It’s those little moments that make all the difference in life! 

Those moments when you look and think how cute! 

Those moments when you feel blessed in that moment and for every breath you take!

Those moments when you feel thankful and grateful for all that you have and all that you will acquire.

Those moments when you feel loved, happiness, and supported.

Those moments when you feel blessed that you have risen from the darkness and into the light.

Those moments you are thankful for all the good in your life!

Those moments you are grateful to be you.

Those moments when you can look in the mirror and truly say, I love you x

7 Steps To Become Happy Being Single!

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 International Celebrate Being Single Day – Feb 14th!

Being redundant can really suck, but what is worse is being made redundant and feeling lost as a single person. But all is not lost. Being single can be beautiful and here are 7 steps you can take to become happy being single!

International Celebrate Being Single Day is just around the corner (Feb 14th), and having founded this special day for singles to celebrate being single, you may be asking yourself, just what is so great about being single. For those of you who follow me on Twitter, you may have seen my www.Twitter.com/quirkycoaching profile and thought, just what is #powerofone. Power Of One is a powerful online training and coaching programme that I am creating, to show you, just how to be single and be happy being single.

Since being predominantly single from November 5th, 2011, I began to challenge my mind about the way it thinks about being in a relationship and being single. I was in relationships with guys who were no good for me since 15 years of age – until 2011 – about 19 years of my life! With the largest period of being single in that time, just 6 months! 2 relationships I had were long term (not good for me) and lasted years. I wasn’t a happy person back then and had low self-esteem. I did not like being on my own because I felt alone and very lonely, I liked to be needed, wanted and loved, and felt I wanted someone there for me 24/7 as life would be boring on my own. I am also a very romantic person.

It is fine to want to be needed, wanted and loved – but what I have discovered is that you need to get these 3 things from yourself first and foremost; to be at one with your own soul – then you will you be happy and fulfilled as a single person and less likely to get into a relationship that is no good for you because you will not ‘need’ to be in a relationship. In fact, you may fill your own life with so much joy and happiness that being in a relationship no longer appeals to you. Either way,  you will have unleashed your power of one and be on your way to being a super successful single sensation.

Step 1. You need to take stock of your life and realise that you have a problem being single and find out why that is.

Step 2. You need to be willing to have an open mind and accept you need to change in this respect.

Step 3. If you have been in relationships for most of your life, you need to give yourself some time to yourself and vow to do all you can to stay single for a set period of time – mine was a year; so I could have time to stop ‘needing’ someone. If on the other hand you have been single all your life and would like to be in a relationship but don’t know how to go about it, then you have some work to do on yourself to ensure you can be single and be happy – as well as work to do on your dating and relationship skills. You can still enjoy dating as a single person and it is good to see what is on offer from a variety of sources, rather than thinking one person is the only choice you have!

Step 4.You need to explore and find things to build your confidence and self-esteem, as well as discover ways to help you to be happy being single. This could include learning from books, articles, training courses, magazines, blogs, videos, audio books and podcasts, or through coaching and/or being mentored.

Step 5. You need to decide what ways you learn best –  visual, auditory (listen), verbal, written, – so you can pick which learning method is best for you and implement it. If you don’t know which suits you best, try each out until you find which works best for you. Being happy to be single is a skill you need to master and maintain and you need to recognise this and accept it.

Step 6. Take massive action. You need to implement what you have learned, if you are not prepared to do this then you will stay stuck being single and unhappy – everyone has a choice regardless of their circumstances. If you have no money there is free to watch YouTube videos, blog posts and online articles to read. There is no excuse for not changing your life!

Step 7. Evaluate and monitor your progress via each learning method. If something doesn’t work, then try something else until you can honestly say you are happy being single.

If you would like the early bird offer for my new online training/coaching course when it comes out – just fill in the form below and you will also receive a free bi-monthly newsletter with information, inspiration, motivation and advice, about how to be happy being single.

How are you celebrating being single on Feb 14th – International Celebrate Being Single Day?

Please add #ICBSD to any posts and media you post online to show how proud you are to celebrate International Celebrate Being Single Day!!

What struggles do you have being single and what help would you like to overcome them?

Until next time

Stay positive

Sandra

KEEP BEING YOU!

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It doesn’t matter where you are, or what you do – just ensure, you keep being you!

People will try to put you down,
Don’t let them, drown you out!

Keep heading for your stars,
The moon, the sun,
It’s all yours.

There is nothing to stop you,
You are supreme,
A shinning light,
A lazor beam.

Shine and blast around you,
In all your glory,
You have found you.

Don’t let the past destroy you,
Look forward and adore you.

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