This is such an incredibly inspiring and thought-provoking video, packed with practical and no-nonsense advice on how to get stuff done when you are depressed, that I just had to share it with you to help beat redundancy blues.
Many a time I hear people saying, I am too old for this or that. Why?
I hear people say I can’t do that now, but I used to do that when I was younger. What’s stopping them from doing it now?
People say I did that, but now I am a grown up. Like not doing a specific thing, makes you grown up, it doesn’t. Being grown up, means different things to different people. Being grown up, in the real sense, means you have physically grown in some way. ‘Grown up’ is a concept and a state of mind.
However, being grown up also comes with stereotypes of what society generally dictates, is acceptable to do, at a certain age.
Being quirky, and embracing my own quirky, you can imagine that I break and defy most of these and I have no shame in doing so.
Having had counselling in the past for depression, I learnt a little about the concept of the inner child and parent within me. At the time, I didn’t really fully grasp the concept. It was after freeing myself from depression, with no medication, and doing a lot to help myself, that I began to understand how these played a vital role in my recovery. Nowadays,the parent and child roles within me, are crucial in maintaining my own mental health and wellbeing each and every day, so as not to fall back into a depressive state.
The parent within me, loves me and nutures me. It gives me positive self talk. It gives me comfort, hope, support and reasoning. If I ever feel down, it lets me know that things will improve and get better. It’s always there in the background should I need it.
The child within me, is no longer just within me, it is me, and I Iove it. It allows my creative mind to be unleashed, to think for itself, to be free flowing and to guide, lead and tell me what to do next. It does this in the most profound and magical way and I am blessed. It’s great for writing, coming up with creative solutions and living a quirky life that is rich with diversity, rewarding and fulfilling.
I encourage you to unleash your inner child. To let go of your inhibitions that stop you from thinking freely and creatively, and that imprison your mind.
Young children try new things, they want to do what pleases them. They like to explore new things. They express themselves freely in the moment, without worrying about what other’s think. They are a bundle of energy and life. If someone tells them they can’t do something, they want to defy the odds, go their own way and just do it. By finding and using these inner child attributes as an adult, there are no limits to what you can accomplish in your life.
By unleashing your inner child, it will free you from the restrictive thoughts and limiting beliefs of your own mindset. This will set you free on the path to success in every aspect of your life. You can be your authentic self. You can be truly unstoppable.
In my past life, as I refer to it, I was old before my time. Now, although I am older in birth certificate age, I am younger, and the authentic quirky me, who I was always born and meant to be. My time for living a young, quirky life, is now. I have unleashed my inner child. How have you unleashed yours?
Tell me your thoughts.
Stay positive and keep beating your redundancy blues.
It can be really hard to stay strong in life. Especially when other people try to persuade you that their way, is the right way. That what they are asking you to do, is what you should be doing. That if you don’t do what they ask, you have failed in life or let them down. This is bad thinking.
It is made increasingly harder when you are more vulnerable. Such as when you are made redundant, you split up from a long term relationship or you have a low self esteem and feel depressed.
What you have to do, is to stay strong, and ask yourself some important questions:
●Is it the right way for me?
●Is what they are asking me to do, going to make me feel good?
●Am I going to benefit as a result?
●What are the consequences going to be for me?
● Am I happy or comfortable with what is being asked?
If you answered no to any of these questions and the consequences won’t be good, don’t do it, and certainly not their way. It’s your life and you have ultimate control over what you do or don’t do, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Stay strong and tell them it’s not the right thing for you to do, and it’s not your way. We are blessed with individuality, and that’s why you must choose what is right for you.
Whilst being redundant, depression can rear it’s ugly head.
One of the ways of overcoming feelings of depression, is to lift your mood by changing your state of being. You can do this through:
- Movement – Such as dancing or playing sport
- Looking – Watching an action movie
- Listening – To music
- Touching – Stroking a pet
All of these should distract your mind and take your focus off your unwanted thoughts.
Depression is a state of mind that manifests itself into your state of being. Your being responds by harvesting unhappy emotions, feelings and thoughts. You need to pinpoint the cause of your depression and literally cut back on it or cut it out completely from your life. Metaphorically speaking – It is like mould that attacks fruit, once it gets hold, it will continue to spread. You can either cut it out and eat the rest, which may still be infected, or you can throw it away for good and never go near it again. Obviously you would never physically cut yourself, as that is wrong and not what I am saying.
Along with changing your state of being, you need to increase your self-confidence and self-esteem. You need to counteract all of the negative comments from others and from yourself, by speaking only positive words to yourself, over and over again. You must ban yourself from using any negative words.
You need to view obstacles as challenges and be blessed for what you have.
Always tell yourself – You are the world’s greatest.
Redundancy can leave you feeling lost, lonely and hurt. Just like when you break up from a familiar relationship, it can be hard to find the motivation to go on with your life because of the pain you feel inside. You need to recognise this as part of the grieving process and start to think of ways that you can make yourself feel better. It is imperative you focus your mind on looking after you.
Write a list of a minimum of 10 things that make you smile, happy, laugh or simply feel good. It could be:
- Taking a hot bath
- Going for a walk
- Speaking to a friend
- Stroking a pet
- Cooking a meal
- Lighting candles around your home
- Going to the cinema
- Playing sport
- Reading a book
- Renting a movie at home
- Eating a food treat
Whatever it is, make time for yourself to do as many of those things as often as possible, at least once a week. The more frequent you do things from your feel good list , the more you will feel positive about yourself, your life and your future.
Until next time, stay positive.
As you probably know http://www.beatredundancyblues.com is your one stop resource for redundancy. As well as the practical aspects of redundancy it also covers health and wellbeing including stress, anxiety and depression.
You may like to know that I do voluntary work as a Health Buddy for CSV (Community Service Volunteers) in association with BBC Radio Devon. We promote health messages, learn from health specialists and encourage the 5 ways to wellbeing:
- Be Active
- Take Notice
On Wednesday 10th of March, I went to a CSV Health Buddy celebration of music and activities from local refugees who are being looked after by Devon and Cornwall Refugee Support.
I could not help but take notice of the variety of talent amongst the refugees. There were lots of activities including singing, sports, character making out of carrots and foods from their country. I learnt more about them and the foods they eat. People from different backgrounds connected and it was lovely of them to give up their afternoon to entertain and teach us.
At this event I was pleasantly surprised to be presented with a bouquet of flowers and a Certificate of Achievement for helping a distressed and vulnerable person as part of my role as a CSV (Community Service Volunteer) Health Buddy.
I was even more thrilled to be told that I had been chosen to represent the CSV organisation at their 50th anniversary celebration, to be held at St James’s Palace in London on Monday 15th of July 2013. In the presence of Her Majesty the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh.
This is a once in a lifetime opportunity that I feel incredibly honoured to be chosen for.
Redundancy can make you feel deflated and powerless. Take back the control in your life by discovering what you were born to do and make it happen for yourself.
I am living my dreams and I want you to be too.